This has been a weekend that I want to stick my fingers into like a huge crate of lentils.  But before I get to that, I have to say thank you to someone.  She’s made of awesome.  Like in a literal sense: I am in awe of her.  She nominated me for this:

I have much to thank the internet for; it gave me my best friend in the whole world.  It kickstarted my writing habit again with “racy fanfic” several years back, and has opened its arms to me when I decided to attempt a serious blog that had more than me flailing about sexy boys.  It’s been here for me in the worst times of my life, and has helped pick me up and push me into the best times as well.  Mostly though, there is a strange family that just suits up and shows up to tell me that I’m loved.  And that is the greatest gift. Ever.

So yes, there are a couple of rules to this award.  And now I will awkwardly attempt to do them justice.

1. Thank the person who nominated you for the award.
(so I tried to figure out how to add a link on here for like ten minutes- failed miserably- and am going to just pretend that I actual am something other than: “Is verra pretty! Doesn’t know shit about coding!”)

Jenny.  Wow.  Sometimes, when I meet someone in person all I can think is, “dude, this person is SO COOL! They will be my friend whether they like it or not.”  I’m not used to having this happen over the internet, but I’m learning it happens even more often than in the really real world.  So yea, this is one of those girls.

She has been kind enough to share some of her writing with me and it’s that sort of honest viceral REAL that cuts me like honey.  It’s gorgeous and witty and heartstoppingly good.  It’s the kind of writing that makes me feel insecure about my own writing, and then she does things like tell me that I inspire her to write it.  Then there is a loud thunk which is usually me hitting the floor because I’ve rolled right off my bed in shock.  It’s that sort of sprawling, arms akimbo, unflattering pose that only happens when I’m, well, floored.

Also.  She committed a blatant act of arson to get rid of some unwanted baggage, and that in my book makes her my people.  Burn baby burn!

So this is me thanking her.  Because when I don’t write I feel alone, and when she writes I feel a part of.  And I think when we write? It’s going to be spectacular, because beautiful women need other beautiful women to remind us that we’re worthy and inspiring.  And honey? You’re one of those women.
2. Copy and paste the award on your blog.

Check! Did it.  It’s SHINY!

3. Link to the person who nominated you for the award.

um.  Go here.  Give her candy in the shape of pretty words. http://neuroclassymom.blogspot.com/

4. Share seven interesting things about yourself.

hmmm.

1. I joined the army once.  My first day of Basic was my 22nd birthday.  The drill sergeants prowled the cattle truck walking across our ruck sacks while a large samoan dude cried for his mom next to me.  I had Tori Amos stuck in my head and would press wildflowers in the book that taught me how to blow shit up. I passed my final fitness test on two percosets and two broken shins by running two miles and puking on my first sergeants shoes.  I think it was the only time he was ever proud of me.

2. I drove to Seattle in two and a half days straight from Cincinnati on a whim.  I was hopped up on AMP and had a panic attack somewhere in the sticks of Wyoming about deer.  Those little bitches would just sit in the middle of the highway in the dark and scare me for sport.  On my way back I picked up two hitch hikers and drove them to Nebraska.  They were in a band and wandered WalDrug with me and swapped driving shifts.  It was the last time I did a great American road trip, for now.

3. My first kiss occurred in the back of a beat up ford pick up with a rusted out bed.  I could see the wheels and the road whizzing beneath us.  I was sixteen and he was seventeen.  We’d just finished a Lakota Sweat Lodge ritual and my skin felt like it was encrusted in salt.  I kept track of our kisses until I hit fifty, then I gave up.  His name was Eric.

4. I shaved me head for the first time when I was 18 years old.  I did it on my Dad’s front porch with a lesbian named Karen.  She was the queen of the Olive Garden I worked at and had long arms and pretty blue eyes.  We cranked up Ani DiFranco and pulled out the clippers and shaved each other’s heads in a cul du sac in the suburbs of Cincinnati.  Later we made out for hours on the yellow bedspread on my Dad’s bed.  I think she’s living in Ashville NC now, but I could be wrong.

5. I have no kids, but I’ve been to two births.  I am sort of the unofficial camera guru of birthing.  I took all the pictures of my little sister Anna’s birth and had the incredible blessing of being the chick on scene for Maria’s Simon.  I promised both of them the same thing the moment I held them. “I’ve been here since you took your first breath, and I’ll be here for you until I take my last.”

They are still, to this day, the most incredible experiences of my life.

6. I have a comic book collection I’ve been lugging everywhere with me since I was eight years old.  Even at my lowest point, I would not sell them.  They are my prized possessions and I read them until the covers fall off.  It’s something that makes the comic nerds in my life cringe, but the stories! Oh.  The stories!

7. One day I’m going to be a teacher.  I’m going to put my serving apron down and pick up a text book.  One day I’m going to walk into a classroom and stare out at kids who are probably not going to care one way or another about what I’m teaching.  It scares me, but lord, I want it.

5. Nominate your own seven Beautiful Bloggers.

I don’t know if I actually KNOW seven bloggers… but I’ll give a list of the ones I love.

http://www.mommymelee.com/ Um, this is sort of a gimme.  I’ve known Maria for like seven years? now.  She is my favorite writer friend and I was priveledged to write with her.  We broke each other’s brains with the pretty words and have managed to make a strange internet omg!girlcrush! into a lasting friendship that I can only thank whatever is looking out for me for.  She’s seen me at my worst and has watched and supported me as I picked myself up.  She’s my best friend, what more can I say?

http://citizendick.org/ .  Well, they aren’t technically beautiful bloggers, but my boy Kevin writes for them.  He was the guy who picked on me in high school, but then had the balls to contact me out of the blue and apologize.  He’s one of the coolest dudes I’ve met in a long time and I’m super glad we reconnected.  It’s a prime example of how people can and do change.  Also? There is free music and he has STELLAR taste.  He introduced me to one of my new favorites Dan Mangan and continues to be my music guru.  After all, we all need someone with the time to listen to the music and point us in the direction of cool new tunes.  I’m just lucky enough to have one who can write.

http://www.minnesotajo.com/ Every once in awhile someone comes into your life out of nowhere.  They are your advocate and cheerleader.  Jo, you are totally that person.  I’ve never met her, but when I do there will be tackle hugs.  I’ve never met someone with a bigger heart in my life, and I’m proud to be among her fans.  Also, she makes me giggle.  ALL THE TIME.

http://www.grumblegirl.com/ So yea.  This is one of the cool kids.  I’m all like omigoodness she’s shiny!  There are pretty babies!  And she’s witty!  *hide*  Luckily, she seems to be the kind of person who doesn’t let me hide, and I dig that.

http://grammarmonkey.blogspot.com/ This girl? She rules.  She may not know how cool I think she is, and how much I wish I could be teensy and power packed with awesome like she is, but I think the cat might just be out of the bag now.  Anyone who will wade through and edit the ridiculous pile of fanfic (srsly, wtf me?) with grace and tact… or even actually sign on to do it? Coolest Person Ever.  Also, she is the most adorable karaoke songstar player of all time.  And she will kick your ass at Halo.

http://morgangoose.com/blog/ Um yea.  I have no idea what he’s talking about half the time.  But he’s my brother.  And he’s a tech nerd.  He makes pretties happen.  Also, when you get the two of us together? Look out world, we’re totally taking over.  If I knew anything about what the heck he’s talking about, I’m sure I would be even prouder than I already am, but since I don’t I’ll just say, he’s my brother, he’s a genius, and he writes about smart tech stuff that is beyond me.  And someone should totally get him to write about his gardening skills sometime, for they are LARGE AND OUT OF CONTROL.

http://brokennerves.net/ I love Melissa.  Really I do.  I want her to come to my house and dress me up like a doll and be all awesome while wandering around my apartment.  We’ve sort of known each other for quite a while now, and that thought has not changed since the first time we “met” on a chat.  Dude, have you seen this girl’s style? It is inspiring.

And wow.  Now all I have to do is pester Kate into starting a blog and I’ll be just about perfect.